Thou shall remember to go to the far-far-west to submit the form for Leave of Absence at least 5 working days prior to the convocation ceremony.
I'm still getting used to it. Oh! Those carefree days when there is no such need as to get approval for leave. Suddenly, I miss being a student. Sans exams and Gaussian bell-curve, that is. Which leads me to the next question: Whenever the question "What are you doing now? Studying or working?" is posed, I'm always caught in the dilemma of how and what to reply. When I say the former, it feels wrong. When I say the latter, it likewise feels wrong too.
Sunday, 7 June 2009
RESPONSES
Ok, this is really random: I don't really like to eat when I'm out.
Purely for two reasons.
More often than not, ALMOST IMMEDIATELY after having completed a meal, either one of the two very predictable responses would - like a self-fulfilling prophecy - occur:
1) I feel hypnotically sleepy, or
2) I feel like sh**ting.
Yes, ok, this is very random, I know.
Purely for two reasons.
More often than not, ALMOST IMMEDIATELY after having completed a meal, either one of the two very predictable responses would - like a self-fulfilling prophecy - occur:
1) I feel hypnotically sleepy, or
2) I feel like sh**ting.
Yes, ok, this is very random, I know.
Thursday, 4 June 2009
LIGHTHEADEDNESS
For the past week, I've not been blogging as actively as before. Have been feeling rather sick. This is the first time bringing this up: I tend to - at times - encounter head rush and giddy spells whenever I stand or sit up from a resting position. Of late, though, it has been on a rising incidence.
Ok, I lied. I'm not THAT sick. The truth is: I've been too busy watching Boys Over Flowers on Youtube!
Part of that is true, though. I tend to get lightheaded - lasting for a minute at its' worst - when getting up from a resting position. It ranges from waves of nausea to spinning rooms to spotted lights to dimmed visions to momentary total darkness - while fully conscious. Sometimes, I sigh inwardly when I dropped things on the floor, because bending down to retrieve it makes my head feel heavy at times. Orthostatic hypotension, they call it. The inability of the body nervous system to compensate and respond to the drop in BP - a result of gravity and change in body positions - fast enough. The causes are aplenty and diverse, and despite all these years, I've not been able to pinpoint mine out. I've yet to get myself diagnosed or checked. Because as opposed to hypertension, hypotension is considered mild and is generally not life-threatening. Because I would hate doing blood tests (to check for anaemia or low blood volume), being linked up to an ECG machine and BP meter (to check the cardial system), and having to do a Tilt Table Test, with the possibility of an IV needle poking into the arm or hand. That sounds frighteningly monstrous and morbidly expensive for a 22yo.
Ok, I lied. I'm not THAT sick. The truth is: I've been too busy watching Boys Over Flowers on Youtube!
Part of that is true, though. I tend to get lightheaded - lasting for a minute at its' worst - when getting up from a resting position. It ranges from waves of nausea to spinning rooms to spotted lights to dimmed visions to momentary total darkness - while fully conscious. Sometimes, I sigh inwardly when I dropped things on the floor, because bending down to retrieve it makes my head feel heavy at times. Orthostatic hypotension, they call it. The inability of the body nervous system to compensate and respond to the drop in BP - a result of gravity and change in body positions - fast enough. The causes are aplenty and diverse, and despite all these years, I've not been able to pinpoint mine out. I've yet to get myself diagnosed or checked. Because as opposed to hypertension, hypotension is considered mild and is generally not life-threatening. Because I would hate doing blood tests (to check for anaemia or low blood volume), being linked up to an ECG machine and BP meter (to check the cardial system), and having to do a Tilt Table Test, with the possibility of an IV needle poking into the arm or hand. That sounds frighteningly monstrous and morbidly expensive for a 22yo.
Sunday, 31 May 2009
7 YEARS?
Just learned that the O levels Chinese paper is taking place tomorrow morning; thanks to the younger brother.
To think that it has been 7 years already!
Has it really been that long already?! Am I turning old, or what?
To think that it has been 7 years already!
Has it really been that long already?! Am I turning old, or what?
WORDS VERSUS ACTIONS
Don't just keep relying on words; let actions do the talking instead.
A person's actions - even, the lack thereof - implies a lot. It reveals the real hidden things in the heart. Words can be faked; well-chosen words may be able to gloss things over; but actions say and reveal it all.
It's actions and efforts that speak volume, and never words. Talk? Talk is cheap. Very cheap. Anybody on the streets can talk.
Don't just talk.
Respect. Trust.
Earn it.
A person's actions - even, the lack thereof - implies a lot. It reveals the real hidden things in the heart. Words can be faked; well-chosen words may be able to gloss things over; but actions say and reveal it all.
It's actions and efforts that speak volume, and never words. Talk? Talk is cheap. Very cheap. Anybody on the streets can talk.
Don't just talk.
Respect. Trust.
Earn it.
Friday, 29 May 2009
Wednesday, 27 May 2009
MAN AND CONCENTRATION
This is one of the photos taken during the wedding banquet 3 weeks ago, starring the bridegroom, K, and the emcee, YH.
Somehow, I really like this photo. There is just something magnetic about this photo that draws my attention. Like bees to nectar.
I've always liked to observe a man who is caught in his full focus. Men doing what they're primarily supposed and called to do. To lead. To guide. To direct.
I think ALL men look brilliantly awe-inspiring when they're concentrating. The furrowed brows; the power in the eyes; the focus in the mind. It is something - a force, even - to reckon with. In moments like these, ALL men look razor sharp. Smart. Efficient. Determined. Confident. Powerful. Charismatic. Authoritative. Mighty. Oh yes, awe-inspiring.
Monday, 25 May 2009
JOKE OF THE DAY
This is very slow, I know, but I only found out on last Wednesday that there is going to be a match between Liverpool and Singapore in... Ermmm... July? If my memory serves me correctly? (Ermmm, honestly, com'on? Is there even a need for this match? Isn't it obvious enough?)
I heard this piece ofold news from the younger brother, who was very excited about booking the tickets. He was practically gushing over it.
Anyway, last night, after logging off from the internet, I went to the living room to take a breather. Sprawling slothfully across the couch, I munched on the dark chocolate cookies which were left over from the day's lunch at Subway. It was then I realized that they're showing the live telecast of a football match.
The younger brother eyed me suspiciously. "姐," he called out, "you know what is Tot?"
"Tottenham, lah!" Please, man, this is a piece of CAKE. Growing up around 2 MALE siblings certainly have some advantages. I used to play games like Championship Manager, Red Alert, Counter Strike, Final Fantasy etc. Well, how could I not? With 2 brothers, the category of games and entertainment available around the house is quite limited.
The younger brother looked genuinely impressed.
"Name me a Liverpool player, leh." He persisted.
Now, I know he's an arrant fan of Gerrad (did I even get the spelling correct?), and hence resisted giving that as an answer. I bit off a hearty chuck of the tasty cookie and contemplated momentarily. "Owen. Michael Owen." I chewed thoughtfully, and a sudden horror striked me, "Oh! WAIT! I take that back! He got transferred out, is it not?!"
"PLEASE, LAH! THAT IS LIKE A MILLION OF YEARS AGO ALREADY, LOH!" The younger brother exclaimed in exasperation. He threw me an incredulous look as though I'm a Martian who just landed on Earth, and proclaimed unceremoniously that I'm the joke of the day.
Crushed.
That's the thing about growing up with 2 male siblings and no sisters. You get ribbed at. Alot.
What can I say? I grew up in the era where Beckham was still handsome, still unmarried, and still had his wind-blown flyaway blonde, long fringe. Shearer, Scholes, Cole, Yorke, Solskjaer, Bergkamp, Fowler, and Sheringham were some of the better strikers I know of. Shay Given, Fabian Barthez, and that old old former-Man U guy (I can't remember his name. Gosh, has he retired already?) were rather good goalkeepers as I remember it. Neville and Butt were the only defenders I know and remember of to date. Ryan Giggs and the handsome Beckham were the 2 dunno-what-left-and-right-wings. Owen, oh yes. Owen was the handsome, young, and super-talented guy in Liverpool. Yes, this is the era I grew up in.
P.S. Okay, I just googled it out. NOW I remember. It's Schmeichel. Peter Schmeichel.
I heard this piece of
Anyway, last night, after logging off from the internet, I went to the living room to take a breather. Sprawling slothfully across the couch, I munched on the dark chocolate cookies which were left over from the day's lunch at Subway. It was then I realized that they're showing the live telecast of a football match.
The younger brother eyed me suspiciously. "姐," he called out, "you know what is Tot?"
"Tottenham, lah!" Please, man, this is a piece of CAKE. Growing up around 2 MALE siblings certainly have some advantages. I used to play games like Championship Manager, Red Alert, Counter Strike, Final Fantasy etc. Well, how could I not? With 2 brothers, the category of games and entertainment available around the house is quite limited.
The younger brother looked genuinely impressed.
"Name me a Liverpool player, leh." He persisted.
Now, I know he's an arrant fan of Gerrad (did I even get the spelling correct?), and hence resisted giving that as an answer. I bit off a hearty chuck of the tasty cookie and contemplated momentarily. "Owen. Michael Owen." I chewed thoughtfully, and a sudden horror striked me, "Oh! WAIT! I take that back! He got transferred out, is it not?!"
"PLEASE, LAH! THAT IS LIKE A MILLION OF YEARS AGO ALREADY, LOH!" The younger brother exclaimed in exasperation. He threw me an incredulous look as though I'm a Martian who just landed on Earth, and proclaimed unceremoniously that I'm the joke of the day.
Crushed.
That's the thing about growing up with 2 male siblings and no sisters. You get ribbed at. Alot.
What can I say? I grew up in the era where Beckham was still handsome, still unmarried, and still had his wind-blown flyaway blonde, long fringe. Shearer, Scholes, Cole, Yorke, Solskjaer, Bergkamp, Fowler, and Sheringham were some of the better strikers I know of. Shay Given, Fabian Barthez, and that old old former-Man U guy (I can't remember his name. Gosh, has he retired already?) were rather good goalkeepers as I remember it. Neville and Butt were the only defenders I know and remember of to date. Ryan Giggs and the handsome Beckham were the 2 dunno-what-left-and-right-wings. Owen, oh yes. Owen was the handsome, young, and super-talented guy in Liverpool. Yes, this is the era I grew up in.
P.S. Okay, I just googled it out. NOW I remember. It's Schmeichel. Peter Schmeichel.
Sunday, 24 May 2009
YEARS
I was looking through my past entries the other day. Starting from the very post in 2005, I randomly clicked on the list of archives.
I laughed, winced, and cringed at my past silliness. Who was that? Is that me? Did I type all these things? What is all these silliness? Had these blog entries not been found under Je Ne Sais Quoi, I would have wondered who the author is. All these silliness! As I read, I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself. On a more pragmatic note though, deleting them would be a more ideal alternative.
It is so sorely tempting! It would be so nice! Everything would be fantastic! All sunshine and rainbows! ALL the entries would be insightful and eloquent and mind-boggling. Hear, hear!
For reasons I can't fathom though, something holds me back. Perhaps it's because all these entries - like it or not - were a real part of me. Perhaps it serves as a reminder of who I once were and how I now am. Perhaps, even, deleting these offending entries means that I'm ashamed of my past; of how I used to be. Whatever the case, I don't want to delete them.
I officially came in in late 2004. I was in the second year of study in TP then. The first time I came was during Easter, and I responded - only to immediately MIA for about 4months due to work commitments during the vacation period. I promised to come back when the new term starts, and I'm grateful that the people did not forget. As soon as term started, the calls came in.
My first ministry was in Nursery in 2005. Poly came and went. Before I knew it, I had already completed FYP and internship, and pretty soon I'll be graduating! I did not want to graduate. I did not want to just stop at a diploma. No matter what, I wanted to continue; but finance was a mightily huge problem. This began a frantic application to everywhere and anywhere. During that period of time, I was desperate; so much so that I had difficulty sleeping. In the end? He proved faithful. He IS faithful. He supplied all my needs. He gave me my desires. He gave me what I dared to believe for. Not only did I got a place to study in, the varsity education also did not cost a penny out of my pocket. The best part is, my allowance and maintainence was ensured. Sure. the sum was not generous, but at least, it is comfortable, and most importantly, it negated the necessity of juggling school and work.
In mid-2006, I joined First Hand. Underwent and completed the training as part of the 9th batch. People tend to bulge their eyes and express curiosity when they found out I'm in First Hand. The curiousity to know more is evident. Typical questions are like, "How is it like?", "How are the people?" etc. Let me tell you now, they're like you and I - normal. Perfectly normal. And they're some of the bravest and most genuine individuals I've come across.
I was glad to be in there. In the midst, a lot of personal things happened and built up. I finally couldn't cope, and stopped serving after a year in there. 3 months later, in November 2007, I left totally. Totally. Yes, I backslid. I'm not proud to say that, I wish to blot it out even, but it's true.
Another 6 months later in 2008, again in Easter, I came back for the first time again. It has been slightly more than a year now. Since then, I've stumbled and scraped some knees here and there. The things that caused me to left back then still come back and bother me once in a while. It's different this time though, because I'm different. Change is a continuous process. The me in 2005 and the me in 2009 is different. It took 4 years, but despite going on to 23 of age, I'm still not perfect nevertheless.
The things that bothered me back then still visits now. Certain things we have no control over, but like what someone told me recently, the only thing we can do is to pray for His will to come to pass - whatever it may be - because it is the best thing that can happen. It took 4 years, but you know what, this is the time of my life.
And I'm glad. Really. If only you can see me beaming now.
I laughed, winced, and cringed at my past silliness. Who was that? Is that me? Did I type all these things? What is all these silliness? Had these blog entries not been found under Je Ne Sais Quoi, I would have wondered who the author is. All these silliness! As I read, I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself. On a more pragmatic note though, deleting them would be a more ideal alternative.
It is so sorely tempting! It would be so nice! Everything would be fantastic! All sunshine and rainbows! ALL the entries would be insightful and eloquent and mind-boggling. Hear, hear!
For reasons I can't fathom though, something holds me back. Perhaps it's because all these entries - like it or not - were a real part of me. Perhaps it serves as a reminder of who I once were and how I now am. Perhaps, even, deleting these offending entries means that I'm ashamed of my past; of how I used to be. Whatever the case, I don't want to delete them.
I officially came in in late 2004. I was in the second year of study in TP then. The first time I came was during Easter, and I responded - only to immediately MIA for about 4months due to work commitments during the vacation period. I promised to come back when the new term starts, and I'm grateful that the people did not forget. As soon as term started, the calls came in.
My first ministry was in Nursery in 2005. Poly came and went. Before I knew it, I had already completed FYP and internship, and pretty soon I'll be graduating! I did not want to graduate. I did not want to just stop at a diploma. No matter what, I wanted to continue; but finance was a mightily huge problem. This began a frantic application to everywhere and anywhere. During that period of time, I was desperate; so much so that I had difficulty sleeping. In the end? He proved faithful. He IS faithful. He supplied all my needs. He gave me my desires. He gave me what I dared to believe for. Not only did I got a place to study in, the varsity education also did not cost a penny out of my pocket. The best part is, my allowance and maintainence was ensured. Sure. the sum was not generous, but at least, it is comfortable, and most importantly, it negated the necessity of juggling school and work.
In mid-2006, I joined First Hand. Underwent and completed the training as part of the 9th batch. People tend to bulge their eyes and express curiosity when they found out I'm in First Hand. The curiousity to know more is evident. Typical questions are like, "How is it like?", "How are the people?" etc. Let me tell you now, they're like you and I - normal. Perfectly normal. And they're some of the bravest and most genuine individuals I've come across.
I was glad to be in there. In the midst, a lot of personal things happened and built up. I finally couldn't cope, and stopped serving after a year in there. 3 months later, in November 2007, I left totally. Totally. Yes, I backslid. I'm not proud to say that, I wish to blot it out even, but it's true.
Another 6 months later in 2008, again in Easter, I came back for the first time again. It has been slightly more than a year now. Since then, I've stumbled and scraped some knees here and there. The things that caused me to left back then still come back and bother me once in a while. It's different this time though, because I'm different. Change is a continuous process. The me in 2005 and the me in 2009 is different. It took 4 years, but despite going on to 23 of age, I'm still not perfect nevertheless.
The things that bothered me back then still visits now. Certain things we have no control over, but like what someone told me recently, the only thing we can do is to pray for His will to come to pass - whatever it may be - because it is the best thing that can happen. It took 4 years, but you know what, this is the time of my life.
And I'm glad. Really. If only you can see me beaming now.
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