LAME IS GOOD

When asked for something descriptive, the word "lame" is among those that would pop up. Well, I don't deny; sometimes, I can be a little cold.



Anyway, this morning, I was relief-ing one of the sec 1NA classes. Apparently, this class is notorious for all the wrong reasons. I went in feeling apprehensive; and a part of me agonized at how unlucky it is to kena this class out of so many others.

I got the class to stand up and settle down - which took quite a while. Following which, I introduced myself. "Class, your subject teacher is not around today. I'm here to relieve this lesson. My name is Ms. P." I paused for a moment to gather their attention before continuing, "Good morning, class!"

They greeted back. I got them to settle down, and stated my rules and regulations. Since this is the last period before recess, I struck a deal with them. If they behave themselves, do their work, and not make too much noise, they would be dismissed for recess a couple of minutes earlier.

They cheered and roared. The deal went down quite well with them. Throughout the period, the noise level is considerably acceptable. Of course, excluding the repeated incidences when I had to get so-and-so to "go back to your seat!" or "come down from the table!" or "lower your volume over there!".

So, it was a pretty good relief period. All of a sudden, a boy who was seated among the front few rows asked a seemingly-innocuous question.

"Cher, do you have a high IQ?"

I looked at him, and the gears in my brain started churning. Is this some kind of a trick question? I eyed him suspiciously and weighed the odds. When you're unsure, saying "I don't know" is always the best way out.

"Not sure. Why?" I replied warily.

"Cher, I ask you ah. This is a bean," He pinched his thumb and index finger together to signify a bean, "and I place it on my palm. Then, I squash it between my palms. What is it called?" He asked.

Without skipping a beat, I replied (coolly, I hope!), "Soya bean (手压bean)."

Thank goodness I've an internal repository of lame jokes; you'll never know what will come in useful.

He looked impressed.

"Then, Cher, why does Superman fly with only one arm outstretched?"

"Cos he needs to change gear."

"Then, Cher, all the trees and plants in a forest have a cake, except for one. What is it?"

I couldn't guess.

"The answer is grass! 'Cos strawberry cake (草没蛋糕)!" He reply joyfully.

"Then, Cher, if a cake is sad, who encourages him?" He persisted.

"Pig," I replied, "because 猪鼓励蛋糕".

"Then, Cher, we have 3 animals: a lion, a tiger, and a pig. Which is the most fearsome among all?"

I couldn't answer this too.

"Pig!" He giggled, "You know why? The lion says, 'When I roar, everyone is scared." The tiger says, "When I roar, everyone is scared." But the pig says, "When I sneeze, everyone kena H1N1!"

I suddenly felt an impulsive urge to throw a chair at him.

"Then, Cher, ask you ah. What is 1 + 1?"

This feels dangerous. I pondered it over carefully.

"I don't know. What?"

"Aiyo... Cher, you like this also dunno? 1 + 1 is 2 lah!" He laughed, "Cher, then what is 2 + 2?"

"No idea."

"4 lor. Then what is 4 + 4?"

I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head.

"8! Cher, so easy you also don't know! Stupid, eh!" He teased, and added as an afterthought, "Oh ya, what's my first question ah, Cher?"

"You asked whether my IQ is high a not." I replied with a poker face (to be fair, I nearly fell for it. I almost said, 'You asked me what is 1 + 1').









FOR ONCE, I'M PROUD TO BE LAME.

Lame-ness is a skill, I tell you!

TOWERED

Lately, my ego has been getting knocks.



Growing up around 2 brothers are not easy. Not only do they smell bad, speak their own language, talk loud, eat alot, and are crazy over football / DOTA / WOW / IT gadgets etc, the most hateful thing is: they tower over me. Yes, even the younger brother, who is 7 years my junior.

Whenever they feel like, they would simply stand right in front of me, puff up their chest, and look down at me. Literally. Look down at me. It feels intimidating. I feel all so puny. I feel as mighty as an ant. Disgusting feeling. I'm secretly lavishing over the idea of using the index finger to p!o!k!e! them in the offensive-looking chest. Puff lah, puff lah, puff your chest somemore? That has gotta hurt! Hohoho!



During lessons, too. It antagonizes terrors me how, more often than not, students are - if not taller than me - at least of the same height as me. There are, like, 3 TALL people in one of the classes; all of whom are males. Of course, as any typical schoolboys, they like to jump and coil up the string cord that is attached to the projector screen. They are simply AWESOME in jumping. The string cord would ALWAYS end up coiling around the projector screen at least 3 rounds. This is a mockery to me because (ahem!) teachers don't - and never will - stand on a chair just to uncoil the string cord so as to pull down a projector screen. No, no, I insist, not that I'm short. Teachers just don't do these kind of things; these kind of specialized jobs are always specially reserved for the tallest in class.

Yeah, right. Who am I kidding?



Anyway, just the other day, the 3 boys were teasing each other. Talk about opportune timing! As I walked into the class, the tallest of them all so happened to tuck the victim's pencil box neatly behind the PA system speaker. It was TOTALLY AMAZING! In my heart, I was like, "GOSH! WOW!!! Oh my goodness!!! HOW ON EARTH...!!! BRILLIANT!". It was picture-perfect! His jump was graceful and light. My eyes nearly popped out, and I nearly requested for an encore. That aside, I was utterly amused by their playful antics. What darlings. Those boys!



I've always thought that the only one kind thing with respect to this job is that my feet can be spared from being subjected to the often-understated tortures of wearing heels. Heels not only promote bad posture, and are also really bad for knees and ankles by creating extra pressure on them. I've always been thankful for the fact that I prance around in heels on only one day per week at most, which is, Saturday.

Well, as the saying goes, "There are two sides to every coin". Today, during one of the lessons, one girl (from the same class as the 3 TALLies) walked pass me. For reasons unknown, she suddenly announced happily (but a tad too gleeful for my liking), "老师，我跟你一样高！"

She's 15.







That sound just now?

Oh, it's just the sound of my ego shattering.

MILESTONES

This is outdated news, but...

I OFFICIALLY graduated 1.5 months ago!

I HATE balloons; AND this big net of balloons was hanging directly above the area where I was seated. ARRRGGGHHH! I nearly had a heart attack!

Temasek Poly Alumnus!
Gold. White. Gold.
Science. Business. Science.

On the fateful day, while getting down to the graduation venue from work (I took a half-day leave from practicum), an unpredicted wave of indescribable feelings - of which the origins are unknown - overwhelmed me. I was thinking, "Is this it?", "Am I really graduating?", "Have 3 years really passed?". I could hardly believe it. It almost feel surreal; something ethereal.



3 years ago, I was 19. Fresh out of polytechnic. Faced with a big responsibility and a big decision, I almost rejected the letter of acceptance into university. Majoring in Chemistry - a subject which I have totally no prior knowledge of. Coupled with an academic sponsorship bond; which means that there is a standard of academic performance to keep up to. It was a painful dilemma; a catch-22. Studying chemistry at varsity level without any chemistry background is already suicidal enough; what's more with an additional academic bond to measure up to. If I were to take up the challenge and accept the admission into university but end up doing badly, not hitting the academic requirements, get struck off the namelist, and the bond, terminated, the damages which I have to cough out would be unimaginable. My family would most definitely have to mortgage the house if it were to happen; and I would be in a sea of huge debt overnight.

I was 19. It was a difficult choice to make. To bite the bullet and plunge in? But would I be biting off more than what I can chew?

I asked around the older people in the cell. The responses were diversely mixed; ranging from "NO WAY! How can you think of rejecting it?! There are so many people out there who would love to receive that letter of acceptance!" to "It's your call. If you feel confident enough to tackle it, go ahead. If you fail, it's ok. At least you tried."

ZW was a bit of both. He expressed his disbelief and exclamations of "Siao ah?!" in joking jest. That done, jokes aside, he advised me to consider it carefully. It was just silly to reject the offer. "You tried hard to get this, didn't you? You appealed to get in; and your appeal is successful. You got in! And this is exactly what you so desired, isn't it? You yourself said you have no wish to just stop at a diploma but to continue studying." I told him about my worries; the fears of not doing well enough academically, getting struck off the namelist, and having the bond terminated, resulting in a massive debt. "Well, gauge it yourself. Do you feel up to it? Anyway, you studied Biomedical Science in polytechnic, didn't you? What, then, is chemistry in comparison?" He laughed. I gave a weak smile, still somewhat unconvinced. "Ok, tell you what. Why not you just accept the offer first? Don't think of rejecting it, ok? Take things as they come; one step at a time. Once term starts, study the best you can. If you encounter any difficulties, let me know, ok? Perhaps I can get my elder sister to coach you. She studied Chemistry in JC, and she is from NJC. Deal?"

"Tell you ah, if you dare to reject the offer, I'll really KNOCK your head, I tell you!" He jokingly threatened.

That last sentence jolted me to my senses and, right there and then, it jump-started a somewhat finalized conviction. Because that sentence is something real and unpretentious. Because that sentence spells - clearly and plainly - the word c-a-r-e. Because I know, somewhere deep down in my heart, I would regret - heavily - rejecting the offer at least once in my lifetime.

Thanks, ZW, for offering to even enlist your sister's help. It really gave me tons of encouragement. Thanks, for offering to knock my head because it woke me up and propelled me forward.



Thanks, too, to XW; who was there, patiently. The times when I was sad. The times when tears overflowed. The times when I had no money to eat. The times of praying for the upcoming examinations. The times of asking for a list of the dates of the exam papers so that specific prayers can be made. The time - especially - that night by the River, when I nearly - very nearly - wanted to give up. I was so tired of everything, and wanted to quit school and start working. I was only in year 1 or year 2, but yet, suddenly, everything is not important anymore. Family. Work. Studies. University. Academic. Sponsorship bond. Damages. Finances. Who cares? What have always been important in my heart, suddenly, I couldn't care, anymore. That night, I asked a very important question, and you gave a very honest answer. It hurt, really, at that instant, it really did. I was shocked because, in my heart, I expected to hear the "oh-so-standard" answer - which did not come. Momentarily, a part of me grieved and resented you for that. For the mere cruelty of the act. For not telling me falsehood. The truth hurt, really. But it made me stronger, and it made my conviction even stronger as well. That, no matter what, I'm going to love - no matter what. That night, the truth hurt; but it freed - and strengthened me - at the same time. For that, I'm still grateful to you. But in the end? I didn't quit school. But. I quit the walk. It must have disappointed you so.



Thanks, for bringing me back. While I was out there for 6months, just as suddenly, you engaged me and extended an invitation; even though I was reluctant to at first. I tried to wriggle and slip off like a fish instead. Thanks, for not even once forcing me to make a decision but allowed me choices. I was lukewarm; unwilling to sacrifice "freedom"; reluctant to commit again; but I was given the space to decide, the grace to choose. Eventually, over time, I did. And because the choice is mine, it has now grown to become something personal; something me. Because the choice is mine, it has now come to a point whereby it is no longer just a decision - which is something factual. And as time goes by, we have differences and have gone through rough patches. But you know what? I'm glad we did.









Anyway, THE highlight of this post is:

TA-DAA!

These people are important, too. Very important. More than important.

At the end of the day, there is - still - no place like home.

LAGGED

Yesterday is a Saturday. It is also the only day which I finished a whole course of the daily antihistamine. I'm supposed to take 3 capsules daily. However, on normal weekdays, I'll only have 2 at most (usually one after work, one before bedtime).

So, yesterday, I was fully compliant to the medication prescription. The first pill was at 9am. Followed by 3pm. And finally, at 9pm again. By 6pm+, I was beginning to stone. The limbs felt so heavy; the brain was lagging. To make things worse, there was a higher-than-usual frequency of standing up and sitting down due to the graduation ceremony. Each time, I took increasingly longer time to respond because, you know, the limbs were heavy. And a graduating student went up to preach. Offhand, I can't recall what his message is; though, one thing I remember clearly: his Chinese is fluently fantastic (of course! He's a Taiwanese!).




On a sidenote, I'm almost completely recovered from the rashes! I'm planning to prematurely stop taking the pills from tomorrow onwards (There are 3 more days worth of pills left over). Hope the rashes won't come back again the instant the antihistamine pill therapy is stopped. Goodbye, drowsiness!

ANTI-HISTAMINE AND CALAMINE

"Very strong," She cautioned, placing heavy emphasise on the word 'very' before continuing, "So, do space it out, say, 6 hours apart. It's really very strong."

I blinked at the lady behind the pharmacy counter. It was a Wednesday afternoon, and I was at the polyclinic to get my unexplained, sudden bout of blotchy skin rash diagnosed. I blinked at the lady behind the counter. What? It's only an anti-histamine drug, isn't it? How strong can it get? It can't possibly be stronger than codeine in cough syrups, can it? I thought and gave the label a cursory glance. "Hydroxyzine." Hmmm... Now, that sounds familiar. Ahhh... Dr. H. Ko. He must have taught it during the Pharmacology course in second year of polytechnic.

I took the medication and thanked the pharmacist. The medication constitutes 7 days' worth of Hydoxyzine and a bottle of calamine lotion. Reached home at 5pm+. Ate a quick, early dinner. Went online. Popped a pill of Hydroxyzine. Went offline. Dubbed some calamine lotion onto the affected skin regions. Then. I slept like a baby.

This morning, I woke up still feeling very drowsy. Man, when she said 'strong', she REALLY meant it. This is worse than any cough syrup. It felt like a Dementor has jumped out of the Harry Potter series and is sucking off my life energy. I changed and dragged myself to school. Totally sapless; my eyes could barely open. I ended up missing the morning assembly (I'm pretty sure that's against the school rules!) to catch some eye-shut.

Aware of the mighty sedative prowess of the Hydroxyzine pills now, I laid off the medication for the whole of today. At 4pm, I finally popped my first dosage of the day. By 4.30pm, I was already off to dreamland, and woke up at 7pm (Yes, good morning! I just woke up an hour ago). I was TOTALLY and COMPLETELY knocked out; it seriously feels like I've slept for 12hours straight instead of a mere 2.5.



Anyway, the good news is: the pills are working wonders! Ever since the anti-histamine medication, the hives-like rashes are now almost gone; though on closer inspection, small random "pimples" can still be spotted cruising through the arms and legs. The good thing is, it doesn't look like it's serious enough to leave scars. So, things are looking fine! All that's left is for the small lil' pimply bumps to subside totally, and I'll be normal again! *WOOT!*



P.S. The doctor suspects the sudden, unexplained outbreak of rashes could either be due to stress, or an allergic reaction to an irritant(s)/allergen(s) in the environment. This is bad, because there is no way of fingering out the culprit(s); so there is no way of knowing what exactly on earth is it that I'm allergic to! AND this is the FIRST time breaking out in rashes like this. Arrgggh...

IF MY FATHER IS THE PRESIDENT...

... I would eat up all the sotongs in this world. No kidding.

BLOTCHY

As of this late evening, the skin suddenly turned blotchy and small little "pimples" broke out with varying intensity. It started off with the upper legs. The bumpy swells went down after a while. NOW it's the arms' turn; and it's swelling like anything. Miniature volcanoes.

It's blotchy but not itchy though. THIS IS SO WEIRD!



Don't ask what went wrong or what I ate or what I did or what I touched or what am I allergic to. The only things I'm allergic to are: the sun (I hate to suntan!), and water (because I can't swim to save my life). Yes, I CAN'T swim. I can barely float. Stop snickering, you prats.









Poor skin.

DANCES

I'm ALWAYS amazed by their powerful dance. Awww...





One of the many many many nice songs of theirs: "Loving You".




New single released on 1st July: "Stand By You"!

NO TITLE

东方神起/ Tohoshinki / TVXQ / DBSK has filed a lawsuit against its label company in late July. Well, not all 5 actually, but 3 of them are. (In case you've been living in Mars, DBSK a quintet music group, and is one of the hottest and famous in South Korea. The oldest is born in 1986, the youngest 1988. Their forte is in their admirable skills in harmonizing of voices and beautiful acapellas; as well as power-packed dances. Famous in SEA, but especially active in South Korea and Japan. They are the first foreign artiste group to TOP the Oricon Charts [think of it as the Billboard Charts of Japan] 6 times)

Oh well, the cause of the problems appear to be the contract and the clauses.
1) their contract spans over a period of 13 years (Military Service excluding),
2) they are only entitled to ONE week of holiday (read: rest) per year
3) they sleep 3 - 4 hours everyday, and
4) the company gets a big pie of 80% - 90% of their income (the remaining works out to be about 1% - 5% per member)

All these are what I read from various sources and papers. One sure fact, though, is that a lawsuit has indeed been filed. They debuted in 26th December 2003; which means that it is only 5 or 6 years into their 13-years contract.

Hope they'll not disband. It'll be such a waste; they're way too talented.



Anyway, very sad 啦.